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Psych Ward

Psych Ward: Hercules & Amadeus Cho

The former best of friends meet before the Assault on New Olympus to attempt to patch things up

By Tim Stevens

The following is an excerpted transcript of a couple's therapy session between Hercules and Amadeus Cho with Tim Stevens facilitating.

HERCULES (taking a seat with some hesitance): What's all this then?

TIM STEVENS: Amadeus, would you perhaps like to answer that question for Hercules?

AMADEUS CHO (quickly gulping down a snack cake): Herc, I know I left you all angry recently, and I didn't even tell you why. And I know that bugged you. I feel very bad about it, but, seventh smartest person in the world or not, I couldn't figure out what to say to you. So, Athena told me to have you meet me here so we could discuss what happened with Tim in therapy.

(long stretch of silence)

TS: Okay then. How do you feel about that, Hercules?

H: Hmm...I'm sorry, feel about what?

TS: What Amadeus just spoke of?

H: I...who? I have heard no one speak but you and myself.

AC: Oh, come on!

TS: Hercules, surely you can see by Amadeus' outburst how invalidating it is for you to not even listen to him when he speaks.

H: Outburst? Perhaps, sir, you need to see someone for therapy as you are obviously seeing and hearing things that are not there.

TS: Now, you and I both know that Amadeus is sitting right th-

H: There is no shame in needing help, you always told me that. I understand that it can be very scary to admit you are cra-

TS: Enough, Hercules. You are several thousand years old, there is no need to behave like you are four.

H: Are four-year-olds loyal? Would they never just leave their friends behind with no reason, no attempt to explain? Because, if that is what it means to be four, then fine, I will act like a four-year-old.

AC: This is ridiculous.

TS: No, no, Amadeus. As you and I discussed before, there was bound to be some hurt feelings with the way things were when you were last together. You have to let Hercules express them to begin to work on them.

H: Tim, why do you still insist on speaking to the air?

(AC throws a potted plant at H at this point. It shatters on H's shoulder, spraying dirt on his torso and in his hair. H pretends not to notice.)

TS: Amadeus that is not an acceptable way to express your anger. There is no tolerance here for physical acts of aggression or threats of such aggression.

AC (turning sideways in his chair and crossing his arms, mumbles): Whatever...

H (standing, casually shaking the dirt off himself): I tell you what, Tim, if...that person you keep mentioning were here, I'd tell him I didn't miss him at all. I would tell him that I had a great time by myself going on adventures. I drank, and caroused, and married an evil elf who was quite the hellcat, if you know what I mean. And he probably wouldn't because he's a big baby.

TS: Hercules, again this is very childi-

H: Yup! That's what I'd say. And then I'd tell him how I dressed up like Thor and then Thor dressed up like me and I looked waaay better in both outfits. And I gave him a purple nurple and it was awesome! So, yeah, I did fine without him. Too bad he's not here to hear that though.

AC (still mumbling, a bit louder): I heard Thor kicked your b-

H (wielding about): Lies! The Prince of Power is equal to any man or god!

AC: Heh...so you notice me now?

H: Aye. Fine. You win. (sarcastic clapping) Please feel free to make me feel bad about myself some more, seventh smartest person on Earth.

AC: That's not what... (shakes head in an exhausted manner, looks towards therapist for help) Tim?

TS: Oooo, unfortunately we are out of time. But I think we've made some real progress today. Really. I am proud of you both. See you next time!

To learn more about the relationship between Cho and Hercules please review the works of Doctors Greg Pak, Fred Van Lente, and Ariel Olivetti in file HERCULES: FALL OF AN AVENGER #1, available for reading on March 17.

Tim Stevens is a Dialectical Behavior Therapy Consultant and Doctoral Intern at a college counseling center currently pursuing his Psy D. who has had experience working with individuals who have difficulty expressing emotions.


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this is... different... but it looks interesting.