|CAPTAIN AMERICA: WHO WON'T WIELD THE SHIELD #1 cover by Gerald Parel|
Who will wield the shield? Been there, answered that. Now, the real question is: Who won't be taking possession of the famous piece of protective gear? It's too easy to say "everybody else," the answer's much more complicated--and hilarious--than that!
On April 21 Marvel Comics proudly unveils the one-shot nobody asked for: CAPTAIN AMERICA: WHO WON'T WIELD THE SHIELD? The answers, as provided by writers Matt Fraction, Jason Aaron and Stuart Moore in three mercilessly funny tales, may shock you!
First up to bat is the surprisingly scintillating Jason Aaron, who pulls not a rabbit out of his hat, but a pair of long johns?
"My story features Forbush Man as you've never seen him!" he boldly claims. "Plus guest appearances by some of the hottest creators at Marvel Comics! And me too! Plus, someone will die! No actually, everyone will die!
|CAPTAIN AMERICA: WHO WON'T WIELD THE SHIELD #1 art by Mirco Pierfederici|
Yeah, yeah; but could ol' Irving Forbush beat Steve Rogers in a fight?
"I thought Steve Rogers was dead," says Aaron. "What kind of fight would that be?"
If you survived that Aaron-nation, please welcome the supremely sly Matt Fraction, who provides WHO WON'T WIELD THE SHIELD with a bit of magic--or maybe some slight-of-hand...
"Dr. Stephen Rogers, transformed by the Super-Satan formula into the pentagram-bespangled sentinel of the arcane, Doctor America," notes the writer of his contribution. "On behalf of the Undergovernment he goes mano eeeee mano with Richard Milhous Manson, aka the sinister Red Dick, and his genocidal assistant Bebe Rebeyonder to save the soul of the swinging, sinister, '60s."
|CAPTAIN AMERICA: WHO WON'T WIELD THE SHIELD #1 art by Brendan McCarthy|
"Well, he hangs out with Baal the Goatboy," says Fraction. "Point: Doctor America."
And when he's put up to a fight with Steve Rogers?
"Who's got the better record collection?" Fraction asks. "Point: Doctor America. Stay dead, blondie! The good doctor is in."
Hang on, True Believers! You only have to suffer through commentary with one more unwieldy writer, namely the sensationally sufficient Stuart Moore!
"I'm privileged to introduce 'Wheezy' Wilson, the Golden Age Deadpool," boasts Moore. "He's there right at the creation of Captain America's famous shield, and...well, yes, there is hilarity. And mirth, plus a bit of levity. A small dash of risibility, too."
We feel we must also pose that "fighting Steve Rogers" question to Mr. Moore, too. He's such a nice guy and all.
"Well, it'd be very confusing," notes the confused writer. "GADP--as I call him--would probably think he was fighting a giant, red-white-and-blue animated-cartoon crow; and Steve wouldn't understand why this raggedy figure in a World War I gas mask was on his case. But I imagine Cap would prevail in the end, as always."
And so shall you, Marveldom Assembled, should you pick up a copy of CAPTAIN AMERICA: WHO WON'T WIELD THE SHIELD on April 21. 'Nuff said!
To find a comic shop near you, call 1-888-comicbook or visit www.comicshoplocator.com
Not a subscriber to Marvel Digital Comics Unlimited yet? Join now!
Download SPIDER-WOMAN Motion Comics now on iTunes!
Download episodes of "X-Men: Evolution", "Wolverine and the X-Men", "Fantastic Four: World's Greatest Heroes" and "The Super Hero Squad Show" now on iTunes!
Check out the official Marvel Shop for your favorite Marvel Heroes!